Sunday, September 07, 2003
So I got this email from mom, chastising me because the photo of Sara is not a good photo of her. And I tried to explain, I have NO good photos of her. She always makes faces or runs away. So the photo is not the best, sorry. She is really very beautiful.
Then mom went on to tell me about their Torah study class today. Reviewing Deuteronomy, which is kind of the explanation of many of the rules. Actually, Deuteronomy and Leviticus are quite similar, but I did not want to mention that. ANYHOW, there is this one chapter in Deuteronomy, outlining penalties for disobedience, etc. that whenever we read, causes myself and my father to laugh till we are in tears.
To save you the trouble of looking it up, here is Deut 25:11:
25:11 If two men get into a hand-to-hand fight, and the wife of one of them gets involved to help her husband against his attacker, and she reaches out her hand and grabs his genitals, then you must cut off her hand-do not pity her.
So here is the mental image:
North East Texas. Friday Night. Parking lot behind the Rio Palm Isle nightclub.
(Rio Palm Isle – A Longview landmark that opened in 1937 as the Palm Isle Club. Operated during World War II by the owner of Mattie’s ballroom, another Big Band club of the era. Today features country / Western entertainment year round. Open daily except Monday. Located at Texas 31. 903-753-4440 )
Bubba is faced off with Ed Earl, his third cousin twice removed, in the midst of a whiskey fueled argument over whose momma makes the best fried chicken & taters. Ed Earl takes a swing at Bubba. But what's this? Bubba's second wife Lurlene jumps in and WHAMMY! Slaps the trademark Kerry Von Erich "Iron Claw" on Ed Earl's package!
Ed Earl crumples in defeat, but Bubba recoils in horror!
"Lurlene what have you done? This goes against Deuteronomy 25:11! Ed Earl, when you can stand up again, go fetch yer axe outta the truck toolbox......."
Oh, I cannot breathe.
If Lurlene tried that with me, there is now a 50% chance she would miss!
Then mom went on to tell me about their Torah study class today. Reviewing Deuteronomy, which is kind of the explanation of many of the rules. Actually, Deuteronomy and Leviticus are quite similar, but I did not want to mention that. ANYHOW, there is this one chapter in Deuteronomy, outlining penalties for disobedience, etc. that whenever we read, causes myself and my father to laugh till we are in tears.
To save you the trouble of looking it up, here is Deut 25:11:
25:11 If two men get into a hand-to-hand fight, and the wife of one of them gets involved to help her husband against his attacker, and she reaches out her hand and grabs his genitals, then you must cut off her hand-do not pity her.
So here is the mental image:
North East Texas. Friday Night. Parking lot behind the Rio Palm Isle nightclub.
(Rio Palm Isle – A Longview landmark that opened in 1937 as the Palm Isle Club. Operated during World War II by the owner of Mattie’s ballroom, another Big Band club of the era. Today features country / Western entertainment year round. Open daily except Monday. Located at Texas 31. 903-753-4440 )
Bubba is faced off with Ed Earl, his third cousin twice removed, in the midst of a whiskey fueled argument over whose momma makes the best fried chicken & taters. Ed Earl takes a swing at Bubba. But what's this? Bubba's second wife Lurlene jumps in and WHAMMY! Slaps the trademark Kerry Von Erich "Iron Claw" on Ed Earl's package!
Ed Earl crumples in defeat, but Bubba recoils in horror!
"Lurlene what have you done? This goes against Deuteronomy 25:11! Ed Earl, when you can stand up again, go fetch yer axe outta the truck toolbox......."
Oh, I cannot breathe.
If Lurlene tried that with me, there is now a 50% chance she would miss!
# posted by cstatman : 11:05 PM
