Thursday, March 31, 2005

this just in from my Sister, from the Austin American Statesman

Flub flummoxes Senate into rare silence

Amarillo lawmaker's cheerleader crack reverberates

By Mike Ward

AMERICAN-STATESMAN STAFF

Thursday, March 31, 2005

The debate was supposed to be about chuck wagons, not cheerleaders.

But before the Senate on Wednesday could vote to designate the frontier icon as the official state vehicle, a good-natured debate went just a tad off the trail. Off into a ditch, actually, and the Senate was briefly left dumbfounded.

The verbal misstep occurred as Sen. Kel Seliger, R-Amarillo, was debating his resolution about the chuck wagon, invented by Charles Goodnight in 1866.

After a fusillade of joking and derisive questions on what he thought was a serious bill -- "Should we call it the Charles Wagon?" "Can we also designate the low-rider as the official state urban vehicle?" -- Seliger shot back over the microphone when asked if he would answer another question:

"I've already yielded more than a cheerleader at a drive-in."

The Senate Chamber was hushed. Jaws dropped. Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst quickly admonished the Senate to move ahead. Dewhurst later said he had not heard Seliger's comment.

After the resolution was approved, an embarrassed Seliger then blamed his remark on "incipient Tourette's syndrome," though he said he doesn't actually have the disorder.

Sen. Judith Zaffirini, D-Laredo, a former cheerleader, said she didn't hear the remark, either. "But I'm sure he meant nothing by it."

"I think the next bill I do will be for motherhood," Seliger later said.

mward@statesman.com; 476-3640


Wednesday, March 30, 2005

six MILLION dollar tent.

The city of San Jose has just won my daily award for biggest collection of dumbasses around.

They are buying a six MILLION dollar tent, to enlarge the existing worthless, overpriced convention center. The tent should last ten years and be 80,000 sq feet. It will first be used to house eBay's convention this june. $6mil. you could buy a lot of crap on eBay for 6 mil.

Okay, color me giddy, but I think for six MILLION dollars they could build the biggest pole barn/rodeo grounds ever. In the middle of downtown.

No, it's wacky Californians, they are gonna spend it on a tent? a FUCKING TENT!

stop the city, let me out. this is blinkard philistine pig ignorance. And I am payin the taxes to make it happen.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

An Asian was trying to exchange yen for dollars at a US bank ...

He says to the clerk, "Yestoday I get two hunat dollah fo yen,
today I get one hunat eighty, why it change?"

Clerk shrugs and says, "Fluctuations."

Asian guy fires back, "Fluc you white guys too!"

Monday, March 28, 2005

Okay, this is too damned much. I just heard about this new fashion trend, and I am sickened.

I am sorry, teeth whitening, a little silly. Fake tans, more silly. Implants, Silicone, Lips, etc, all vain, but this! this is just effin ridiculous.

If anyone I KNOW is doing this, stop it right NOW.

Friday, March 25, 2005

It's funny how you can have your mind made up, and be plotting and scheming, and know EXACTLY what you want. A Rat Rod. Then you spend a few hours, and your mind changes.

Last night I was helping my pal Ken Armann, he is the brit motorcycle genius who helps me with my Enfield & BSA. We upgraded his computer a little bit, and in the course of the evening, discussed my desire for a rat rod, cool car, hot rod bikes, cafe racers, etc. And he planted this tiny seed in my mind. A Stock Norton Commando 850. Possibly a little customized. But not the new one.

HMMMMM


HMMMMMM

it would take less room, it would be MUCH less expensive, and it is closer to something I know.

Dang it!

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Sara's car is a PITA. The Mighty Festiva is cool, and there are clubs of people who love them. , it will start, but intermittently, it doesn't. No, it doesn't leave her stranded(<-not work safe), just takes a few attempts. Months ago someone (not me) did a tune up, and I believe stripped the sparkplug threads.

At the advice of Joe, who is brilliant, I bought a 14mm thread repair kit, and put it in last night. Some cars have 'short' sparkplugs. Not Sara's. I hand tapped through about 1.5" of aluminium. Lots of turning. I was sore. very sore. Woke up in the middle of the night with wicked bad cramps in both calves from standing funny (squatting) to reach parts to turn.

finished threading this morning, put in the new insert, with lots of green sleeve retention loc-tite. Then sparkplug. let it sit the recommended 30 minutes. started right up. well, after all the cutting fluid & WD 40 blasted out of that one cylinder.

I hope it runs better for her. I love working on cars and bikes, but not when it is my main form of transport. YAY Sprinter!

Joe, who we already discussed as genuis has plotted out a path for my success and happiness. He is pretty cool. and he has mad skillz. (Vote for Pedro) I am just gonna flat out quote him here, because his brillince is overwhelming. He was commenting about my desire for a rat rod, as posted earlier.

Master plan:
1. Get crappy old motorcycle and associated parts out of Joe's shop.
2. Make sure woman is a keeper for the next THIRTY PLUS YEARS!!!!!!
3. Have children ASAP!!
3a. Children are cheap, do not use "debt" as excuse.
4. Pay bills.
5. Buy large American convertible to carry family to Tasty Freeze Ice
Cream store on weekends. (family cannot enjoy "Rat Rod")(unless all live in
"double-wide")

Please note that steps 1 and 2 are of equal and tantamount importance
to success of any further steps.....
>>>>

Now, in order
1) in the works. my honda CB 175's will be moving to California in April
2) it fluctuates. some days she is wonderful, other days she makes me more insane-r
3) gotta settle 2 first
4) I only carry a note on the house and car. everything else is paid. but house is BIG check
5) maybe not a roadster, maybe a lead sled as a rat rod???? mmmm ICE CREAM!


My pals Flash and Beth are also helping me out with some mental dilemmas, I still want a hot rod.

someone told me a few days ago, that they felt they could always ask me for help, with anything. And I replied, "yeah, that's what friends DO" the more I think about it, that's really what I want, to be thought of as someone who will be there for his pals.

i now want a nap

Monday, March 21, 2005

i have way too much goin on. I need to write a list, and start checking things off.

other than that, I am considering selling my Harley. I want a Rat Rod. but really? I need to payoff everything, and get my keister out of any debt.

and have a kid

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Work

Crazy

Busy

insulation at the house is done. I am eager to see how well it works


DO NOT put these there!

Sunday, March 13, 2005

cops.

the paper touts San Jose's low crime rate. they do not mention the total authoritarian feel downtown, or the complete lack of presence in the neighborhoods where crimes go unreported.......

Saturday, March 12, 2005

tired, little queasy, my own fault

no patience to write, but HAD to share this with everyone.

What could be better than having someone COME TO YOUR HOUSE and cook Bacon for you?

There is a web service that provides this wonderful offer.

if this page does not make you smile or laugh, you need to check your pulse.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Wow. This kid hates peanut butter, and he was super pissed.

While I have 'altered' food before, nothing like this, ever. Wow. What the heck was he thinking? Didn't the recipient have a clue? Who figured it all out? And why in the HELL IS IT IN THE NEWS?

The news should be covering more important things. Like Jet Powered Beer Coolers! Things that make a daily difference in all our lives. To keep us from dying of simple things, like broken legs.

oh heck, I am so busy at work I can't go on with today's silliness. YOU find funny things and send them to ME for a change.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

I wake up this morning with fierce pain in my right hip. As if someone heated a knitting needle moments before jamming it through the flesh, upwards, into the ball & socket where the leg joins the hip. I roll over, Sara is sleeping so peacefully, I do not want to wake her. I lie in bed for over an hour till she wakes up.

This burning is a reminder of back in '88 when the rear wheel on my Yamaha R5 racebike came unlaced in turn one at Oak Hill Raceway. When a spoked rear wheel comes unlaced at 95+mph, it tends to disintegrate, causing the bike to sit upright for a moment, then the rear goes into an oscillation, moments before spitting the rider off and setting the whole mass end over tumbling end.

As I was rolling along the track, I vividly remember the heel of my right boot smacking off the face shield of my helmet, background flashing rapidly between earth & sky, earth & sky. and I was thinking "ya know, I should not be able to see my own heel. That's just NOT right"

As it all came to a stop I blacked out for a second or two, then came around laying on the ground with a dislocated hip, thinking "I have 2 more races and my other bike is in the pits ready to go. If someone will pull my leg so it pops back into place...."

The crash truck came, the ambulance came, they brought everything back into the pits. As the ambulance crew was debating transporting me to the Henderson hospital, some of my vintage racing buddies came by to see me. I convinced one of them to grab the right foot, and pull straight from me. SLURP-crackle-POP! the joint lined back up, I was able to stand, and told the ambulance guys I felt great.

Hobbled back to the pits, hopped on the second bike, and ran my last 2 races.

Bought a bag of ice and carried it in my lap for the trip home to Austin, really, there is not anything the doctors can do for a dislocated hip. I tried to stay off it as much as possible.Years later, when that hip fires up, I know the weather has changed.

If the collarbones do not ache (different crashes) then I know it is a mild change, and not a major one. In Texas, I was able to tell the weather by it. Not so mush in San Jose. Microclimates, Silicon Valley can be cold in the morning, warm in the afternoon, and freezing at night.

But today? for some reason, the hip was right. It was foggy and damp this morning, but has since burnt off, and is a clear, sunny, beautiful day.

Cold and damp in the morning does mean my Royal Enfield Bullet will run great. The cool air keeps the motor cool enough to make great horsepower. The dampness helps it burn fuel efficiently and cleanly. I woke up knowing exactly what I was going to ride to work.

Shower, dress, pulled the mighty Bullet 350 out of the garage.

Fuel on, Choke pulled. Key in the off position. thumbed the compression release, gave her 2 very solid kicks to fill the cylinder with fuel-air mixture.Kick gently to top-dead-center. Key on. Headlight off. Compression off. One strong kick down, with follow through, and she fired right up! I let her warm up for a few moments, then flipped on the headlight.

Idle out the driveway and up the street. Turn One is a 90 left with gravel, followed quickly by Turn Two, a 90 right with a van always on the corner. short chute to Almaden Expressway, where you merge from the right, but the early morning bastards coming up to a red light will NEVER EVER allow anyone to merge.

Screws to them. I amble gently along the merge lane, till they are all stopped at the red light. I weave through 2 rows of parked cars, then lane split up to the light. HA! Fools! Trapped in your cages, sipping your triple mocachino-latte starbuck crap. You are insulated from the world in your little cage, drinking your corporate coffee, about to slog through traffic to your corporate job.

As the light changes, I snick the lever up to first, and gently leave the light. quick punch down to second, and I am ahead of the pack. I reach down and flip the choke off. She is purring like a kitten. Snick! third gear, and we are moving now. The expressway has a gentle left bend to an uphill grade, approaching the stoplight and left turn to the metered Highway 87 entrance ramp.

I drop to fourth, tuck into the gas tank, and make speed up this hill. As you approach the stoplight, traffic is always backed up, in 2 left turn lanes. I get to the last of the stopped cars, sit up, shift down and drop to about 10mph. Split between all the waiting traffic to the light, turn, and split down the metered entry ramp.

As I see the stop light change, I go behind the cars. Merging onto 87 is just as bad as Almaden Expressway. California drivers suck. That simple. "I'm not letting you in! I OWN this road! Look at me! I'm a dumbass!"I wait till I see an opening. Traffic is moving at a blistering 25mph. I duck between a woman applying make-up in her Jetta, and a dumptruck driver who is sympathetic to the vintage bike.

Slide over to the center to split, snick snick snick through the gears. I am in top gear, I am coming up to speed. The fog is not a wall, but a mist, you can see rows of taillights and coffee swillers. flip on the high beam, tuck into the tank, and WHAMMY! I am cruising along.

Highway 87 dumps most of these folks off in downtown San Jose. Then it flattens out, opens up, and has a long, fast, freshly paved strip along the airport. I crawl under the paint. I am tucked in so far, I have to look UP to see the speedometer. It registers 80mph. The motor is running cool and efficiently. I know it is probably running about 65mph, but it feels like the Ton.

I move my left hand forward to grip the fork tube. My right elbow is tucked into my side. I am covering the brake levers in case someone does something stupid. But traffic is steady, i have a good clearance on all sides. I am tucked and moving. It feels great. My heart is slow and steady, my eyes dart forward, to the mirror, the sides. I am in the "ZONE" I feel the road, I see the birds, the bike and I are one. I am free.

Much too soon, we come up on the 87/101 interchange. This is a large skyway ramp affair, with the majority of traffic leading up the ramp to the left for 101. they are stopped up to 1/2 mile back. I am going right, 87 to first street. I glide past the stopped traffic. See a man reading the paper. More women and the makeup. Both on cell phones. Doing everything BUT driving.

The Bullet & I slow down, we are getting to intersections and surface streets. As we weave our way to work, every car with an Indian driver looks and points. It is not normal to see a Bullet 350 in California.

We coast into work, park in the lot, and must part ways. I am into the office, to sit and slog, to write and make decisions. The day will warm up, my hip no longer burns, the Bullet won't run as good on the way home. But for a brief moment this morning, I was free. I was flying. I cannot think of a better way to live.

Friday, March 04, 2005

Once Again, my pal Joe has helped me out. He went over to John's house in Austin, and picked up all my CB 175 stuff. Is storing it for me till I can get to Austin, or till he & Chris come out here for the motorcycle races in July.

YAY JOE!

Additionally, he caused me to turn my nose into a beverage fountain by telling me how HE is monitoring his weight loss. I use a scale, he measures how deep his bellybutton is.

Imagine a tire pressure gauge? that pops out to show how many PSI your tire has? Well, have one that goes IN to measure how deep your bellybutton is!

YAY JOE! Humor when I need it

Thursday, March 03, 2005

correction, the box from Wisconsin came from Tony, Sara's brother, not her folks. However, Tony came from her folks, so I think it all counts.

Many thanks to all who replied with with possible suggestions for my neighbor Orry and the computer. My cousin Evie suggested a senior tech center. They only offer windows, but may have a Mac annex. Will see what happens.

Yesterday, good news, bad news.

Good news? My Harley's starting problem was a broken primary wire, I would have never found it. $127. Cheap!

Bad News? Got the court notice for the speeding ticket recieved in November. They lost it 2 or 3 times, but finally found it. Now I think I will set a court date and see what happens.


OH! this morning. 170lbs. yay

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

I just asked Jack this info, then thought I would present it here too, in case anyone has any suggestions. and NO I am NOT gonna write a book on how to use computers.


>>>>
I have a mac related question. I have been busting my kiester on the internet trying to find any resource for teaching an ederly person how to use the mac.

My next door neighbor has had an LC3 for years. I gave him my pal Beth's G3 Powermac, and converted the filemaker database he has been working on.

this is great, he is able to continue making databases of all his cassette tapes, a little faster. (odd project, but we hope to entertain when we can, right?)

Anyhow, while helping convert and transfer data, I realized, he has NO CLUE what he is doing. he is following a rote proceedure for how to open filemaker, open his one database, and enter data.

He does not understand files, folders, difference between application & data, etc.

I am NOT up for this challenge, I do not have time.

BUT I wondered if you know of ANY resource to quickly bring an elderly fellow up to speed on how to really use the computer.

I want to help him be more comfortable, and REALLY use the computer, then we will get him hooked up to NetZero or some cheap ISP, and let him see the web.

After he is comfortable with the mac.

I cannot find anything in the bay area to help seniors use macs. Just Pee Cee. Cupertino, Apple CENTRAL, just up the street, and what for training? nothing I can find.

Do you know of any volunteer programs that teach basic mac computing?

Or any tapes, training guides, or hell, just paper workbooks?

thanks

today is silly busy at work. But I did hear from a college pal who was very dear to me, that I'd lost touch with. So that's great. I'm waiting to hear about her kids and family!!!!

Oh, and I am wearing my new A.A. Roedl polartec fleece pullover, thanks to Sara's folks. I am nice & warm in the office.


links, just links

what is the BEST way to Eat Sushi? At Todai of course. But if you can't do that, well, off a semi nekkid chick is pretty cool too.

Build a TV Typewriter, for all you retro hackers

Wanna know what hip hop is? ask some of these guys. they are old now.

Okay, I really think many doctors are out there, but this fella made a web site of tome of the things that SHOULD cause you to question the profession. See the Museum! Mavel at the devices! Wonder at who would shove these things in their Keister????

punk rock gear for your pals punk rock kids

uhh, Snake in the Hopper! reminiscent of the possum in the toilet on the Oertli Lane house in Austin. When Brave Brave Jim Queen the roommate saved us all with a pocket fisherman, trash can, and his nerves of steel.

old foreign ads for computers. Can you find Isaac Asimov in the Radio Shack Commercials?

If you are gonna do porn wannabe pix, take the photos of your kids out of the background.
(semi-worksafe)

gosh I miss Austin

today is silly busy at work. But I did hear from a college pal who was very dear to me, that I'd lost touch with. So that's great. I'm waiting to hear about her kids and family!!!!

Oh, and I am wearing my new A.A. Roedl polartec fleece pullover, thanks to Sara's folks. I am nice & warm in the office.


links, just links

what is the BEST way to Eat Sushi? At Todai of course. But if you can't do that, well, off a semi nekkid chick is pretty cool too.

Build a TV Typewriter, for all you retro hackers

Wanna know what hip hop is? ask some of these guys. they are old now.

Okay, I really think many doctors are out there, but this fella made a web site of tome of the things that SHOULD cause you to question the profession. See the Museum! Mavel at the devices! Wonder at who would shove these things in their Keister????

punk rock gear for your pals punk rock kids

uhh, Snake in the Hopper! reminiscent of the possum in the toilet on the Oertli Lane house in Austin. When Brave Brave Jim Queen the roommate saved us all with a pocket fisherman, trash can, and his nerves of steel.

old foreign ads for computers. Can you find Isaac Asimov in the Radio Shack Commercials?

If you are gonna do porn wannabe pix, take the photos of your kids out of the background.
(semi-worksafe)

gosh I miss Austin

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